A smell of pigs
- By The Rambler
- Published 24th November, 2007
Paul Bérenger, who has been catapulted back to his rightful office of Leader of the Opposition, is working wonders with his Private Notice Questions, a.k.a PNQs, at the National Assembly, and he is the envy of all the fine honourable gentry gathered there to change the lives of the docile people of Mauritius.
After his very opportune and crucial question regarding the sovereignty of Mauritius over our landed properties lying in the middle of the Indian Ocean, he has this week queried the Government on the issue of pigs.
We all know that a great tragedy has just struck the porcine population, as the swine fever has blown over the pigs, and the greater tragedy suffered by their owners for having lost them. The whole country, as a pig-eating nation, now stands bereaved and deprived of its daily ration of pork. It was therefore very appropriate and apt and timely of the Leader of the Opposition to have asked his PNQ.
Some very narrow minded people are now pretending that Bérenger is only playing his favorite game of politics and trying to lure back the Creoles to his MMM den, because almost the totality of pig breeders happen to belong to that community. “When a drought or a cyclone or any other calamity affects the crops, our sugar cane and our vegetables and flowers, Bérenger never shows any interest,” they observe. Now, this is a very spurious attitude and a dangerous way of looking at it, and we refuse to subscribe to that view.
But the whole PNQ session about the pigs had been debated in an atmosphere proper to a pig sty. The pig-headed Leader of the Opposition even mistook one of the parliamentarians for a pig. When the latter objected and said he had never belonged to the porcine species, Bérenger became more precise and explained it was another man he was referring to as a pig. We don't know if there was a big mirror there in which the Opposition Leader was peering at that precise moment, but we were certainly reminded of George Orwell's “Animal Farm” in which they looked from the men
to the pigs, and from the pigs to the men, and couldn't say which was which.
Lawyers and liars
Lawyers and politicians are disqualified from participating in a lying competition organised in the English Lake District which used to be the haunt of 19th century poet William Wordsworth, and which is an important tourist attraction now. This annual competition is held to crown the biggest liar of the year.
The prize this year has gone to one John Graham, nicknamed Johnny the Liar, who has already bagged the award 5 times. For this year's competition he came up with a cock-and-bull story of a World War II German submarine that was preparing an attack on the television of Whitehaven, the first British city to have adopted digital television.
He also cooked up a story about catching an extra long cod.
The competition draws curious tourists and particioants worldwide and is held in commemoration of an innkeeper named William Ritson who was famous for his hilarious stories which he told his clients.
Among recent winners, one related having discovered a farm where they bred sirens. Candidates have 5 minutes each to tell their stories. They don't have the right to use any props.
Aswe said, lawyers and politicians cannot take part in this contest because they are professionals in the art. The very nature of their work forces them to be perpetually lying. And if somebody is a lawyer-cum-politician, he might be apt to open a school for lying.In any case, we believe most Mauritians would also be disqualified de facto. We Mauritians are a highly lying nation. We lie on all occasions and in all seasons. For reason or no reason. We lie to our parents, we lie to our children, to our bosses, to our employees, to our teachers, to our students, to God, to ourselves, in fact, to everybody.
In short we are experts at lying and at inventing stories and excuses and creating smoke without fire. Everybody lies in Mauritius except probably lawyers and politicians.
Is that a lie?
After his very opportune and crucial question regarding the sovereignty of Mauritius over our landed properties lying in the middle of the Indian Ocean, he has this week queried the Government on the issue of pigs.
We all know that a great tragedy has just struck the porcine population, as the swine fever has blown over the pigs, and the greater tragedy suffered by their owners for having lost them. The whole country, as a pig-eating nation, now stands bereaved and deprived of its daily ration of pork. It was therefore very appropriate and apt and timely of the Leader of the Opposition to have asked his PNQ.
Some very narrow minded people are now pretending that Bérenger is only playing his favorite game of politics and trying to lure back the Creoles to his MMM den, because almost the totality of pig breeders happen to belong to that community. “When a drought or a cyclone or any other calamity affects the crops, our sugar cane and our vegetables and flowers, Bérenger never shows any interest,” they observe. Now, this is a very spurious attitude and a dangerous way of looking at it, and we refuse to subscribe to that view.
But the whole PNQ session about the pigs had been debated in an atmosphere proper to a pig sty. The pig-headed Leader of the Opposition even mistook one of the parliamentarians for a pig. When the latter objected and said he had never belonged to the porcine species, Bérenger became more precise and explained it was another man he was referring to as a pig. We don't know if there was a big mirror there in which the Opposition Leader was peering at that precise moment, but we were certainly reminded of George Orwell's “Animal Farm” in which they looked from the men
Lawyers and liars
Lawyers and politicians are disqualified from participating in a lying competition organised in the English Lake District which used to be the haunt of 19th century poet William Wordsworth, and which is an important tourist attraction now. This annual competition is held to crown the biggest liar of the year.
The prize this year has gone to one John Graham, nicknamed Johnny the Liar, who has already bagged the award 5 times. For this year's competition he came up with a cock-and-bull story of a World War II German submarine that was preparing an attack on the television of Whitehaven, the first British city to have adopted digital television.
He also cooked up a story about catching an extra long cod.
The competition draws curious tourists and particioants worldwide and is held in commemoration of an innkeeper named William Ritson who was famous for his hilarious stories which he told his clients.
Among recent winners, one related having discovered a farm where they bred sirens. Candidates have 5 minutes each to tell their stories. They don't have the right to use any props.
Aswe said, lawyers and politicians cannot take part in this contest because they are professionals in the art. The very nature of their work forces them to be perpetually lying. And if somebody is a lawyer-cum-politician, he might be apt to open a school for lying.In any case, we believe most Mauritians would also be disqualified de facto. We Mauritians are a highly lying nation. We lie on all occasions and in all seasons. For reason or no reason. We lie to our parents, we lie to our children, to our bosses, to our employees, to our teachers, to our students, to God, to ourselves, in fact, to everybody.
In short we are experts at lying and at inventing stories and excuses and creating smoke without fire. Everybody lies in Mauritius except probably lawyers and politicians.
Is that a lie?
